A wardrobe malfunction waiting to happen

I got up at 6:30 to walk the dog. I was feeling good about being up early, getting the day started right. And then I considered my choices of attire for a pre-dawn walk in 40-degree weather.

• pants: black, dark gray, or navy
• jacket: dark gray or navy
• gloves: black
• hat: brown, black, or dark gray

At least the dog is reflective.

Here's your headline: Bunnies Bite Breslin, Breslin Bleeds Badly

I am pleased to announce that this blog has been named one of the top Pre-K teacher blogs in the Midwest! Thanks to Teacher Salary Info for the much-deserved, if geographically iffy, plaudits. We wear our badge with pride.
If you're coming here looking for information about preschool teaching, I should warn you that you may have to dig a little to find it. Also, please ignore the post entitled "Britney Spears Sex Riot."
New trivia coming soon. Really, this time I mean it.

Also, that two-week-old grilled cheese could not have been tasty

We begin this week with Finn, praying to his newly created Cheesy Savior for a win in their first football game...

... and I'm out.

Last season's timeline was... flexible, but Murphy & Co. could at least plead poetic license for stretching the last two weeks before each competition over five or six episodes. But what school, at any level, has its first football game of the season after a month of classes? This time last year, the team was already 0-6. And while we're on the subject of football, Sam gets leveled by a defensive back who was "cheating right all night," then we come back from commercial to a bit about him being injured by a 23-year-old left tackle on steroids? Left tackle is an offensive position, for Pete's sake. If we're not even going to pretend to get the details right, I'm not going to pretend to watch this as anything other than a 70's-style sitcom in which time does not exist and every episode ends with no permanent changes to anyone's world. It's a shame.

Trivia returns later this week.

Britney Spears Sex Riot

Today's Glee post is unnecessary, as there was no temporal placement (not to mention no real plot advancement). I give you instead the following link.

All coffee, no omelet

That didn't make any sense.

Okay, let's get past the strange character turns, particularly Quinn's and Santana's. High schoolers are teenagers, and they do things even they can't fully explain all the time. The whole Sunshine subplot was absurd, but we needed to introduce new characters. The lack of Jayma Mays is distressing, but only slightly so, particularly since this particular episode was so concerned with catching us up with the kids and stuffing as many songs as possible into a single episode like frat boys into a phone booth. Lots of this episode didn't make sense, but what I talk about here is temporal issues, and so that's where I'll focus.

The new football coach comes in to practice and announces everyone is cut, and it's time for new tryouts. That's great and all, but if classes have started, the team has been practicing for weeks, and has probably already had a game. It's not unheard of for a new coach to show up after the season has started (particularly if the old coach has a breakdown), but school budgets don't get set after the students show up. When does this episode take place? If it's before classes start, what is everyone doing in the halls? If it's after, why are all of these little subplots just happening now? Did anyone associated with this show actually go to high school?

Speaking of going to high school, are all of these kids in the same class or what? We know that Rachel is a junior (sure, she looks like she's in her twenties, but John Hughes did this all the time), but all we know about the rest of the cast is that none of them graduated. Even Matt, who we could have graduated in a nod to the fact that people are only high schoolers for a short time, transferred. Finn was the star quarterback for the football team last year, and Quinn the head cheerleader, and Santana her replacement, so one might have thought at least one of them was a senior, but that wasn't going to happen. Perhaps this is their graduation year? Certainly, the school's best football players, the captains of the cheerleading squad, not to mention the school's #1 "power couple," weren't all sophomores last year?

Anyway, there were funny bits, but mostly this episode was a steer with six teats and no oink. Hopefully, this is an aberration, and we can get back to some actual plot, instead of six music videos interspersed with whatever filler is deemed necessary to get to the next song.

A Quick Tip

I'm not sure who it is that has decided that I am a "Mom Blogger." I'm not a mom. I'm not a parent at all, but the point is that, if I were, I still wouldn't be a mom. Maybe having my gender mis-identified shouldn't be offensive, but it is.

As thrilled as I am to get mail in the blog's inbox, sending the Preschool information about your site, and then telling me how great it will be to "connect with other moms in [my] area," is a good way to ensure that you're reported as spam.

Thanks for your attention, and happy back-to-school week.

Just Put Some In My Hands For A Dime!

Actual conversation at Jimmy John's this weekend:

Manager: Hi folks, I'm afraid all we've got left is wheat bread.

Me: Wow, really?

Manager: Yeah, we just got slammed and are trying to catch back up.

(this is backed up by the large stack of trays containing uncooked bread)

We have enough bread for one sandwich.

Me: Oh. Okay, well, in that case... (scanning the menu board) I'll have an Italian Club.

Manager: Would you like it on wheat?

...